Tell Ur Boyfriend if He Says He Has Beef That Im a Vegetarian and I Ain't Fuckin Scared of Him

We've all been there.  Your dapper charming self has wooed a daughter past mode of traditional engagement or maybe nighttime time escalation.  You get domicile, the mood is right, the drinks accept been flowing and you have convinced her that in fact, yes… sexual activity is a great idea.  That magic moment comes when you first undressing her, she is on your bed and lifts her perfectly shaped bottom six inches off the duvet cover so you can slide her underwear off.  And then you see information technology…

The dreaded roast beef.  The meat curtains.  The sleeve of wizard. Call it what you will, but for near that is quite the turn off and the last thing a human like yourself wants to see flapping in the wind before engaging in the feel-adept coitus that could have been.  Contrary to popular belief, information technology is not genetic.  Nor is it caused past how many men she'southward slept with, or how large those men were.  Some porn stars take cute entry points.  So how does one avoid such a surprise?  Are there ways to place roast beef prior before it's too belatedly?  The respond is Aye, and here are 5 means to practice so:

1. The Fatty Paradox

Virtually fat girls do non have the carcass cape.  The reason is simple — the backlog fatty in and around the pelvic region creates an changed consequence on the vaginal lips, pushing out the blubber and inducing an inwards plough of the labia.  Similar to how a black hole operates, the skin is sucked in creating the nice vagina effect.  While she may pound away a ton of roast beefiness, at to the lowest degree her nether region will be devoid of any such flap happy activity.

ii. Vowels

Avoid girls whose names end in consonants.  This may seem strange and unsubstantiated by science, but it'south true.  If y'all take an Erica, a Melissa, an Yvonne, or perhaps an Alexandra, rest assured yous volition accept that perfect slit surprise when yous are set to do the deed.  The beautiful symmetry of a nicely shaped vagina, each lip in straight proportion to the other just separated past a slight line.  No excess labial flap, no peek-a-boo wraparound meat skin.  It's chosen the "o" face for a reason.

However, god speed to you if you happen to go home with a Marilyn, an Allison, a Brittany or cartel I say a Colleen.  I hope you have your spelunking gear gear up, considering it is going to take some cavernous earthworks to find that clitoris under those goose wings.

3. Vegetarians

This i is self-explanatory.  I take still to meet a vegetarian girl who sports dildo drapes.  If she doesn't consume meat, she doesn't yield meat.  Rumor has information technology that protein deficiency causes aesthetically pleasing vaginal formation, but the medical studies have withal to come in on this.  Stay tuned.

four. Window Coverings

This tactic only works if you finish up at her place.  Are her windows covered with blinds and shutters…or curtains and drapes?  If it'due south blinds or shutters, she psychologically identifies her slit with straight, symmetrical openings.  Proceed equally normal.  If she has curtains or drapes nevertheless, she is accepted to long, malleable pieces of textile.  You can see where this is going…

v. Gym Clothes

Let'southward exist honest, those piano accordion lips take up some extra room.  So when you run into a girl at a bar, or the office or maybe a friend'due south dinner party, simply innocuously bring up the gym and what people wear while they exercise.  Mention your underarmour clothing.  Tell her you have noticed a trend in yoga pants and spandex leggings for female gym attendees.  Does she cramp at the idea of wearing things so tight?  Does she discuss the "freedom" of loose shorts for exercise?  If so, y'all may have a closet pancake draper.  Conversely, if she is one of the major proponents of lululemon pants then you may very well take a lady who sports an = sign for a vagina.  Congratulations, a winner is you.

Hopefully I have saved some of yous from the pain generally associated with being lured into the big labia luncheon.  Then there you lot have it.  Five almost indisputable ways to place, and consequently avoid, roast beef.

Read Next: The Perfect Adult female: Lips

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Source: https://www.returnofkings.com/8455/how-to-identify-a-roast-beef-vagina

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